I almost broke down!

So far so good but I have to say, the recycled bags have become one of my biggest challenges. Two nights ago I was in the grocery store... snow, ice, 10 degrees, big lady fighting me for Chris' favorite flavor of ice-cream... and I went to check out and sure enough those crazy recycled bags were still in the trunk of my car. Now it's been an insane couple of weeks so I sat there in line thinking "Just this once and I'll never forget again" but then I realized I couldn't do it. So I got out of line, stashed my cart in produce, bundled up, put on my gloves, glared back at the guy stacking the apples who was thinking I was leaving a full grocery cart that he was going to have to put away, and fought my way through the storm to get those damn bags.  When I returned to my cart I made sure the produce guy noticed my " servant to the world" sigh as I tossed my recycled bags in and walked away.  Lesson learned!

Let's see, the book I've almost finished - I was out of everything for two whole weeks so I'm giving myself some room on finishing the last few chapters by tomorrow. I'm still having a salad a day ...compliments about trimming down have occurred but I'm not sure if I can give the 5 lbs of spinach I've eaten since January 1st the credit.  I'll start reading the Colorado High Plains News to the sight impaired on Monday. And last but not least, I will definitely be in the pool by the middle of next week... swimming in the Winter was so much easier when I had a good looking coach. I've asked Chris to help but he refuses to pace the edge of the pool in his Marky Mark Calvin Kleins... I think the idea of carrying a clipboard and swinging a whistle turned him off.

Here's what I'm talking about!  

“You’re engaged!!! Now what?

The Series Premier – Announcing your engagement.

As I was browsing one of my new favorite blogs, jezebel.com I came across this photo of Katherine Heigl at the premier of “Dresses” in California and it caused a few thoughts to start to link.  First, one of our closest friends, Josh Hancher, worked in the camera department on “Dresses” so I can’t wait to see it because I love flaunting even the most obscure connections I have to Hollywood … and because I’m planning to replace Angie (Jolie that is), my current body-double, with Katherine – hey, a woman has a right to dream.  Second, it’s February and everyone becomes engaged on Valentine’s day. Third, when you’re engaged on Valentine’s Day one of your yearly romantic evenings is eliminated because you will celebrate your engagement and Valentine's Day at the same time from then on .  Forth, what is it about planning a wedding that makes brides so unbearably bitchy… or sickly sweet (you know what I mean).  Fifth, I’m reading that book about weddings. And sixth, and perhaps the most interesting thought, my dear friend Heather Clark, Calluna Events, wedding planner to the stars in Colorado (and some in Costa Rica), invited me to catch up over a cup of coffee.  Yes, this is exactly how my mind works!  

Since we're at the start of yet another wedding season I've decided to look to Heather for some professional advice (for everyone) about engagements, weddings, showers and, most importantly, dealing with the “Britch”.  What’s a Britch? See, rednecks have claimed the word “Bridezilla” so I’ve come up with something a little less mainstream and, in my opinion, more fun to say.  

Before I move on to the of dos and don’ts of announcing your engagement (this is going to be an ongoing series) I need to point out a difference between myself and Heather when it comes to administering advice.  Heather has the kind of class that prefers not to make an example of others when identifying negative behavior.  I on the other hand have the type of class that does!  So Heather will offer the advice and I’ll provide the case in point. I’ve been subjected to enough of these things (weddings that is) so I’ve got some experiences of my own to dip into.

You’re engaged… now what?  
Well, Heather says you should sit back and let the joy of the moment sink in.  If he asked you in a private moment then let it be a special time between you and your future husband. When you’re ready to make the announcement then the TWO of you should decide how you’re going to share the big news. Usually this is done IN PERSON and the bride’s parents/mother should be the first to hear. Traditionally the groom’s parents come next and then brothers, sisters, friends, co-workers, grocery store clerks… on and on.  If you’re living out of town or for some reason can’t make the announcement in person you should definitely pick up the phone and call parents and close relatives with the big news.  AVOID leaving a message on the voice mail. The announcement will set the tone of how you envision your two families building a future together.  It’s that important.  

 Now I agree with Heather but for different (just as important) reasons. If he asked you in a fancy restaurant (which they usually do) then my guess is that it’s after 8 pm so you should refrain from making any calls until the morning. 1, In the South it’s rude to make phone calls after the evening news… the ONLY exceptions are birth and death. 2. Calling everyone immediately means the desperation paid off and you finally got your hooks in him!  The first question you will hear will be “When did he do it?” so show some class and wait a day.  And 3, you MUST find out if he asked your parents for their permission. I don’t care if this is your first marriage or your third, if he didn’t ask your father then keep your mouth shut and get that guy in front of your dad as soon as you can – in some cases the wedding budget depends on it!  If you’re dad isn’t a possibility then he should ask your mother or a brother / close male relative or friend.  This is a sign of respect for the people in your life and I think it’s important.  

Now if he has asked your parents for your hand then by all means you need to tell your mother first. Chances are she’s been locked in the bathroom since the day your fiancé announced his intentions just to keep from telling the whole world.  If you have to make the announcement via telephone then I suggest you pay particular attention to the time of day as well as your dad’s caller ID capabilities. It is critical that you are calling from your own phone and it must be AFTER 10 am. Any earlier and “free milk” comes to mind… heaven help the bride who’s family thinks she’s a slut.   I’ll leave it at that.

The next step and the last one I’ll dive into today is what to do after everyone’s heard the big news… DON’T START ASKING EVERYONE YOU KNOW TO BE IN THE WEDDING!  Even Heather offers some firm advice on this point. You and your groom (and your mother!) need to decide on a very vague (still sweet) reply to the many questions you will start to receive about the size of your wedding, the number of friends who get to be in it and where you will have the reception.  Until you have a chance to seriously consider how you envision your big day you should keep your options open and the only way to do that is to avoid promising your best friend that her rotten little kid gets to dress up like the cherub she’ll never be and walk in front of you down the isle.  Every time I see this all I can think is “Here Comes The Brat”.

This is supposed to be a flower girl!  What happened to the $30 dress from the mall?!  This is what I'm talking about... if you agree the wedding will become all about this kid! 

But I love ice-cream!

This Dr. Ewww entry was sent to me by a good friend who lives with a doctor... she says he's not the source for this anti ice-cream campaign but I'm not sure, you know how mean doctors can be when it comes to vices.  I never checked to see if I can share her name so I'll ask and let you know.  

As women age, they secrete less hydrochloric acid and fewer of the digestive enzymes needed for fat and protein breakdown in the intestinal tract. In one study, 40 percent of postmenopausal women lacked hydrochloric acid. Without sufficient hydrochloric acid, calcium and iron absorption become more difficult. For women of all ages with chronic tiredness, a meat and dairy based diet can aggravate these symptoms. This is because the body must use so much energy to break these foods down before they can be absorbed, assimilated, and finally utilized. All parts of dairy products are difficult to digest the fat, the protein, and the milk sugar. Digesting dairy products demands hydrochloric acids, enzymes, and fat emulsifiers, which a fatigued woman may not produce in sufficient quantities. Eggs and meat protein are equally difficult to digest for a chronically tired woman.  Ewwww!

Still at it!

After 16 days I'm still sticking to my resolutions! Ok, I realize this doesn't really deserve a pat on the back but you have to understand, some of these resolutions have required changing entire aspects of my life. Which ones? Well ...  eating a salad each day is a perfect example. Making a point of eating all those good for ya greens means that I've become conscious of my sugar intake - no more random chocolate, no more candy bowls at the office, no more sugar & butter sandwiches (they're goooood!). Another example is using the reusable grocery bags - it's very strange to carry something into a grocery store and now I'm distracted by having to keep an eye on my cart for fear that someone will boost my snazy recycled bags.  And what about the self check out?  If you try to put your groceries into your bags before you pay that voice says " Unidentified object in bagging area, please remove to continue"... it pisses me off!  All human strife aside, I'm sticking to it and now Chris is getting involved... he's keeping some of the snazy bags in his car too.  It's actually fun to have some rules to live by.  This week I get back to the gym... we'll see if I'm still humming the same tune!

-S

My two cents...

One of my hobbies is writing letters to people who write letters to the editors.  I get such a kick out of the opinions of others... especially when I think they should be running for mayor of La La Land.  So here's a letter I wrote in response to the town's response to a cop cracking down on a teenager's disrespect.  The story goes that the kid was playing hacky sac near a cafe, repeatedly he lost control and the bag landed in the cafe, the cop said to move, the kid declared his rights (little creep), the cop said "give it to me" and the kid said "you can buy it from me", the cop issued a $250 ticket, the parents cried.

Letter to the editor regarding Boulder’s outcry at an officer writing a ticket to a 17 year old for rude behavior:

I find it hard to believe that an officer who looks past “the gauntlet of jugglers, beggars and bums” (an exact quote from another letter to the editor) would honestly decide to pick on a 17 year old “boy” minding his own business while playing hacky sac in apparently the only hacky sac arena in Boulder.  Pa-lease! If you’ve ever spent time down on the Pearl Street Mall and you have at least one good eye, the last thing you see are teenagers actually doing something other then showing off for each other.  I’m not saying this is bad, I’m just saying that it has the power to tempt one who would normally act as a loving precious pet at home, to turn into a gross little jerk completely capable of mouthing off to an officer.  You can fuss and complain about a ticket but at least be honest about the fact that an officer would not decide to screw with a teen who is minding his own business and doing nothing to bother other people... and while we’re at it could we please consider that it’s not entirely impossible that a good kid could use bad judgment?  Parents, when you aren’t around, your kids sometimes cuss, sometimes they say crude and vulgar things, and sometimes they disturb the peace and many times they are rude to authority. $250 is a cheap lesson in respect so pay it and say thank you.  By the way, do teens get jobs anymore?

Spice Jones
Boulder, Colorado